LENGTH: 107 words from today's column
TARGET: Reckless bankers who make big gambles with taxpayer money
PREVIOUS TARGETS: Rude dictators, bigotry toward gay people (see below)
I'm as pleased as anyone else to see a rising Dow, but somebody needs to slap the incipient grin off Wall Street's face.DATE: April 21, 2009
[...] Compensation is the marquee issue -- the unimaginable amounts of money Wall Street's alleged best and brightest paid themselves for taking stupid risks with our money. I don't see how this materially differs from theft, and I heard nothing from Obama about trying to claw any of this money back.
Wall Street's actual role is more like that of a giant casino where the gamblers are rewarded for taking outrageous, unconscionable risks with other people's money. If the bets pay off, the gamblers win. If the long-shot bets turn out to have been foolish, we're the ones who lose.
HEADLINE: When Slapped, Slap Back
TARGET: Venezuelan President Hugo Chavez and Nicaraguan President Daniel Ortega
SLAP-WORTHY OFFENSE: Insulting President Obama at the Summit of the Americas back in April
IN HIS OWN WORDS: "Those who were not gracious enough to show respect for him deserved to be given -- metaphorically, of course, and in the spirit of hemispheric cooperation -- the back of the presidential hand"
DATE: December 23, 2008
HEADLINE: Mister Robinson's Neighborhood
TARGET: Rick Warren, Barack Obama's inauguration committee, anyone who discriminates against gay people
SLAP-WORTHY OFFENSE: Choosing conservative pastor Rick Warren, who has opposed gay rights, to deliver the inaugural invocation
IN HIS OWN WORDS: "I don't like the choice of Warren, especially in this context. An inauguration is all about symbolism, and it seems to me that choosing Warren -- so soon after Proposition 8, which he supported, and his offensive linking of gay marriage to incest and polygamy -- can only be seen as a slap in the face to the millions of gays and lesbians who voted for Change."