We don't have confidence in this. Deadline has the completely shocking and totally devastating news that Carrie Underwood, of American Idol and country pop ballad fame, is going to be playing Maria von Trapp in a live broadcast of The Sound of Music. We took the news harshly, and so did some others:  

How should I kill myself? RT @thr Carrie Underwood to Play Maria von Trapp in NBC's 'Sound of Music'

— billy eichner (@billyeichner) November 30, 2012

Now, TV versions of classic musicals have never shied away from stunt casting—our minds immediately go to the Cinderella starring Brandy and Whitney Houston, which was great—but something about this news just offends our sensibilities. Maybe we're underestimating her abilities, but something about Underwood's throaty twang doesn't scream Julie Andrews or Mary Martin to us. We understand the choice because even from here we can almost see the dollar signs in executives eyes, but it also seems too based on looks: Underwood fits the profile of how we think Maria should look—blonde, pretty in a totally non-threatening way. 

If we had our choice, we'd probably pick a star with roots in Broadway, like a Sutton Foster, though we know she's not a big enough name for something like this. One can only hope they'll pepper the rest of the cast with those type of people. (The 1999 made-for-TV Annie did that wonderfully.) 

Alas, we're going to have to wait another whole year for this sure-to-be train wreck to occur: it will air around the 2013 holiday season. The whole thing kind of makes you wish they had picked Anne Hathaway. Kind of.

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Esther Zuckerman