Today, Fox News' resident fashion expert Geraldo Rivera finally cut through the noise and got to the heart of why unarmed 17-year-old Trayvon Martin was shot in the chest in February: He was wearing a hoodie. "I’ll bet you money, if he didn’t have that hoodie on, that nutty neighborhood watch guy wouldn’t have responded in that violent and aggressive way," he said on Fox & Friends. "You have to recognize that this whole stylizing yourself as a 'gangsta'… You’re gonna be a gangsta wanna? Well, people are going to perceive you as a menace." I mean, duhh!

It's pretty clear: wear a hoodie, you're a menace who someone will fear. As a service to other people in society flirting with death in these drawstringed, cottton garments, we've identified them by name so they can ask themselves if wearing a hoodie is really worth losing a life:

Elliot from ET:

[IMDB]

Ellen Page 

[IMDB]

Rupert Grint (aka Ron Weasley)

[Reuters]

American Apparel Hoodie Girl 

Justin Timberlake

[Reuters]

Rachel Maddow

[MSNBC]

Justin Bieber 

[Reuters]

Jesse Eisengberg as Mark Zuckerberg:

[IMDB]

Mark Zuckerberg as Mark Zuckerberg 

[AP]

Geraldo Rivera and Bill O'Reilly That's right! The pair were sighted at a Yankees-Mets game in 2007 wearing... hoodies, which honestly just goes to show how brave the former war correspondent really is.

[Media Bistro]

Want to add to this story? Let us know in comments or send an email to the author at jhudson at theatlantic dot com. You can share ideas for stories on the Open Wire.
John Hudson