Hillary Clinton Won't Testify on Benghazi Because She Has a Concussion

AP
Connor Simpson 12,242 Views Dec 15, 2012

Oh, gosh, the uproar this caused! We learned today that Hillary Clinton took a little tumble this week and she hit her head. Now she can't testify at her Benghazi hearing as scheduled. 

So, the State Department released a statement Saturday informing the masses that Hillary is at home receiving treatment for a concussion. Everyone went into a real frenzy. There were BREAKINGs and FLASHs. Because it's terrible! Concussions can't happen to Hillary. She should be running around taking adorable pictures with Meryl Streep and not getting concussions. See, our Hil was working through a stomach virus and became dehydrated. If you haven't been dehydrated with a stomach virus before, well, things start to spin very quickly and you get light-headed, and sometimes you fall and bonk your head. Hillary fell and bonked her head. 

And that's the story of how Hillary Clinton got a concussion. Doctors say she'll be fine, though. It happened earlier in the week, too. They just didn't tell us until today. That's how insignificant this is. No need for panic. She's going to work from home this week, but she's "looking forward to getting back into the office."

The only trouble is, Clinton was scheduled to testify at the congressional hearings about the Benghazi attacks on Thursday, but now she can't make it according to State Department aides who told the Associated Press. She could maybe testify at a later date? Maybe they'll go on without her. 

Who knows? Politico's Seung Min Kim reports her deputies William Burns and Thomas Nides will testify instead of Hillary. 

The important thing here is: get well soon, Ms. Clinton. 

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